No matter how many years you’ve spent asking for more, explaining your value, hearing “no,” getting the occasional “yes,” making compromises… the dreaded negotiation is wrought with baggage for a lot of women. Baggage we were able to unpack , break down and work through at the MPLS MadWomen Get Yours negotiation workshop led by Caitlin Rogers of Rebel Raise and Next Day Animations.
We covered a lot of ground, but a few things stuck with me more than others.
STOP TALKING
I’m a nervous talker. This has always worked against me when it comes to negotiations. Every time I start the conversation, I ask for the thing, explain why it’s deserved, and then I just keep. On. Explaining. Caitlin emphasized how important silence is in the negotiation process. State your ask offer up the supporting data points and then stop talking.
2. Value is in the Eye of the Beholder
When determining your ask, you should do your research. Search Glassdoor and Salary.com to figure out the market value of your experience and your role. But , remember those are just data points to help you understand your value. But when it comes down to it, value is in the eye of the beholder. You have some power over your worth. Caitlin reminded us, “you can make a compelling case to influence your perceived value.”
3. Value is Transferable
Asking for the raise, promotion, perk becomes a lot easier when you’ve worked with your boss for years and they understand who you are and what you can/have been delivering. But, what happens when there is a shift in your organization and your boss leaves or the entire company is reorged?
Caitlin suggests asking your exiting boss to write you a letter of recommendation you can give to the oncoming leadership team. This transferable good will combined with institutional knowledge and demonstrable company loyalty will give you an edge come time to negotiate.
4. The Art of Concession
A flat “no” can put even the most practiced negotiator on tilt. But no fear. Caitlin has some wisdom to share on this front, too. She explained that it’s important to name the pain...“well, that is disappointing, I was expecting more.” This demonstrates that you are, in fact about to compromise and frames up the conversation accordingly.
The second part of the concession formula this is to ask for your compromise… “but I’d be willing to consider the offer if we could arrange for me to work from home two days per week.” The final part of the formula? STOP TALKING.
Crowdsource Your Wisdom
Seeing women support women is phenomenal. I’ve been to a lot of industry events over my career and this was one of the most impactful. Not just for the tips Caitlin impacted, but for the energy she brought to the room. Everyone was engaged, eager to support each other, answer questions and share their wisdom.
We had hiring managers offering up perspective to job seekers. Women sharing their own struggles and wins. My favorite was a tidbit about the science behind nervous energy— apparently it’s just your body’s way of getting more blood flow to your brain so you can think better.
The whole morning was an example of what we can achieve if we’re unabashedly honest and willing to offer and accept help.